Keeping on Top Of Being Supermom

Being a mom of younger children going to school or crèche means that, like it or not, besides your normal day job and seeing to your home, you also have an additional PA role.

Let’s face it, smaller children would leave their own heads behind if it was not screwed on so it is up to the parents (read in, the mom) to make sure that the right books are packed, that clothes for various extra activities are packed and that nobody forgets bakersman, an outfit for some or other fantasy dress up day (and there is always a dress up day) or show and tell.

I sort of have a system in place. I know that on Monday’s, Noodle needs to take an object starting with a certain letter and that Squish needs a book on Tuesdays. However, try as you may, surprises will always be sprung on you. Take last week for example. We thought we had spring day sorted- a plant for Squish to plant (as requested by his teachers) and lovely spring day outfits packed out the night before. Spring day arrived and I was super pleased with myself as it was seven a.m. and both kids were dressed and having breakfast- perhaps we would make it on time for a change! No such luck. Halfway through breakfast, Noodle pipes up “Don’t forget that we have a picnic today and we need to take picnic blankets and snacks for the entire class”. This was the first I was hearing of any picnic so had to spring into emergency action.

Then late last night, when Noodle was sound asleep, her class Watsapp group came to life, mommies scrambling to find out what was required for today’s homework. Now, Noodle did not mention anything about homework yesterday (it is very rare that they have homework per se). Which meant that this morning, during breakfast, she was scrambling to put something together.

As my children get older, I do expect them to take more responsibility for remembering their own stuff but for now, they are just too young.

So here are my ideas for keeping on top of being a super mom:

• Keep a monthly calendar on the fridge with everyone’s weekly schedules and what has to be packed for each day.
• Pack lunches the night before and refrigerate.
• Have an emergency stationary stash. Ensure that at all times, you have a supply of coloured cardboard, markers and glitter glue. Keep this in one place, together with scissors, glue and tape.
• ALWAYS have an emergency stash of quick baking ingredients, for example a cupcake mix. Oh and keep an eggless recipe on hand because chances are that when a mommy emergency crops up, it will be 10 p.m. and you will be out of eggs.
• If your child has to take a set amount of money each week for bakersman or some similar activity, have a stack of coins stashed in a convenient place, already sorted into piles of the right amount so that you are not scrambling to find the exact amount of change during morning rush hour.
• If you need to send nappies and spare clothes to nursery school, pack five piles with the right number of each item into individual Ziplock bags over the weekend and then just pop one bag into the bag each day.

Now for me to practice what I preach! What are your top super mommy time-saving tips?

A Noodle Story

One of Noodle's favourite games is still the one where the two of us tell a chain story where each one adds a line and the next continues. Her tales continue to amuse.

Here is last night's bedtime chain story.

Once upon a time there was a little girl called Layla. She had a birthday party but it was not just any party. It was a princess monster party and everybody had to dress up as monster princesses.

First she sent out special invitations which only appeared on the paper when you poured water on it. She invited a few of her close friends. They played games and ate cake. The cake was a monster cake but it tasted yucky so everybody started throwing it at each other... until the birthday gilr said 'stop it, I don't like it'.  

Then they played some games. One of the games was building puzzles (I think I have a nerd in the making.) Then they hit a pinata. The prizes in the pinata were super special, better than any other prizes they had ever seen before. It has (wait for it) stationery in it. (See, nerd in the making... but hey, she may have got it from her mama.) It also had a few magic wands in it.

One of the girls used her magic wand to win all the games. The other children were very cross that she was cheating and started hitting her with their wands. (Yes, Noodle decided that this was cheating.) She felt really bad and wated to make it up to them so she turned all their cakes and sweets into giant cakes and sweets and made magical party packs with sweets that would never run out. They all enjoyed the rest of the party and only did nice magic tricks with their wands.

Then they used their magic wands to clean up all the mess (yes that was my contribution of course). 

THE END  

Just Catching Up

I just realised I have not blogged in two weeks. It has been a busy patch with lots of changes and lots of work and this one is going to be a quickie post too (especially since our WIFI is acting up as well). Where has the time gone?

My kids are growing up so fast! Squish is finally making progress with potty training- thank goodness as I am totally over cleaning up and disinfecting little puddles around the house. Noodle is very proudly reading books all on her own and she reads bedtime stories to me! 

Both kids are obsessed with My Little Pony (even my son) after we received a blog drop with some really cool toys and discovered that it is back on Nickelodeon. 

We are still stressing about grade one registrations as we have not received confirmation from our preferred school yet. 

I have fallen off the healthy eating and exercise bandwagon (again) this last few months but am trying to be good again because most of my pants will no longer close at the top. Hubby has downloaded some great exercise apps and we exercise together and I am reading a very insightful book by Deepak Chopra about changing your mindset when it comes to food. 

I am enjoying the slightly warmer weather and can't wait for spring and also to doing proper blog posts again soon. That's about it from me. What have you been up to?

Saying No to Mommy Guilt

Part of the basic anatomy of being a mother is wanting what is best for our children. However, as parents, sometimes that comes with doubt as to what actually is best for our children and for our families as a whole. With every decision comes positives and negatives, and with the negatives comes the mommy guilt that so many of us are guilty of inflicting on ourselves. I know I am guilty of it. (Disclaimer: while I refer specifically to mommy guilt, I am certain that much of this applies to daddies too.)

The mom who chooses to stay at home with her family may be filled with guilt about sitting at home all day, not contributing to the household income. She may spend her free time feeling guilty about having free time to do things on weekdays and wonder about whether she would have been able to provide more for her family if she had been a working mother. She may feel guilty about wasting any special talents that she may have which could benefit society at large by only seeing to her family's needs. She may feel guilty when she cleans the house instead of actively playing with the kids and she may feel guilty when the house does not look like something out of a magazine because surely as a stay-at-home mom she has all the time in the world to get it looking that way.

The working mother may feel guilty about not spending enough time with her children or about missing daytime sporting events. She may feel especially guilty if her family can get by without a second income but she chooses to work despite this, whether to provide for a better quality of life, for personal fulfillment or to make a contribution to society at large. Even the work at home mom might feel guilty about not giving her children her undivided attention while seeing to her work, or not giving her undivided attention to her work while tending to her children.

Even everyday decisions about what we allow our children to do may lead to feelings of guilt. Putting a firm stop on all sweets may lead one to feeling guilty about depriving them of fun and enjoyment while giving in will no doubt lead to guilt about enabling unhealthy food habits and possible health issues later on. You may feel guilty about sending them to play at grandma's house so you can sleep in a bit longer and just as guilty if you didn't, as you deprived grandma of the chance to play with them when you know she was looking forward to doing so.

Chances are, that as a parent, you will feel guilty sometimes about shouting your children too much or losing your temper when you shouldn't have. However, let's face it, children know how to press all the right buttons and it would take a saint to never get angry with her children. While we can all work on trying to control shouting matches before they set in, meltdowns (both of the child and the adult variant) are inevitable. The list is endless.

 

Personally, I often feel guilty about all these things, amongst many others (and I have not even started on the guilt that comes with being an imperfect spouse.) Today I am making a conscious decision to rid myself of mommy guilt, in the knowledge that whatever I chose to do today, it is what I feel will best benefit my family in the long run. I am making the decision to be firm against indecisiveness and doubt and to stick to my guns. I am making the decision to strive towards perfection but to accept and embrace the inevitable imperfection. I hope that some day, my children will come to understand the decisions that I have made and respect them as I have come to respect the many sacrifices that my mother made for us. 

Do you suffer from mommy guilt? Have you managed to overcome it? Or do you choose to embrace it? Please share your story.

A Date with My Daughter

Do you ever spend alone time with just one child or go on a 'date' with your child alone? I have been reading a lot lately about the importance of spending one-on-one time with your children individually, to help them feel valued as individuals and to keep the lines of communication open. 

While I have lots of alone time with my son, who only goes to nursery school a few days a week, it is very seldom that I get to spend alone time with Noodle and I got the feeling that Noodle was craving some one-on-one attention. When Squish was younger, his nap time always used to be our special bonding time but he has dropped his midday nap a few months ago. We decided to declare this Saturday 'Noodle Day'- a day to do what she wanted to do (within reason). The two of us would have a girls morning together, while dad and son got some quality bonding time too.

The top item on her list, surprisingly, was to go for a haircut. She has been asking us to take her to get her hair cut for ages and her hair has grown super long, going all the way down her back so it was probably time for a trim. We went to Chop It, a child-centred hair salon at Lifestyle Centre in Randpark Ridge. It is a child friendly salon set in an 'enchanted forest'. The little ones get to watch a DVD of their choice while they get their hair done and they get treated to a lollypop and a balloon afterwards. It is a great place for younger children who are a bit nervous to get their haircut and you can even get a certificate for first hair cuts.

Besides the awesome hair salon, the other reason I picked Lifestyle Centre is because they have so many other things for children to do, making it perfect for our date. Noodle went on a couple of rides at the amusement park and had fun playing on the jungle gyms. We went for a walk through the nursery and the pet store (her favourite place) and had a good chat. Then we stopped at The Silver Birch for some hot chocolate (we couldn't finish them- they are huge!). Noodle and I had a good chat about anything and everything. 

After we had some family visit us in the afternoon, the fun continued in the evening with a visit to Montecasino- this time with daddy and baby brother too. We never go near the casino area here but there is lots of other entertainment for the whole family and the kids had a blast. They played games, had a bite to eat and ran laps at the big grassy patch outside. We have been watching Youtube videos learning about various geographical landmarks- the Kabah, the Great Wall of China, the Taj Mahal, the Eiffel Tower, the Statue of Liberty, Big Ben etc. So my son was very excited when he spotted the clock tower at Montecasino, saying "look- there's Big Ben!".

All in all, it was a great day for the whole family and Noodle declared it the best day ever. Operation Noodle Day was a success!

Potty Training: Girls vs Boys

I am not a potty training expert but having had two children, a boy and a girl, I have noticed huge differences in the potty training habits of girls and boys. My findings are in no way based on scientific empirical evidence but merely from what I have observed from discussions with other moms, what I have seen in the potty training classes at my children's pre-schools, extended family members and most importantly, what I have seen with my two little ones.

To me, it seems like girls are WAY easier to potty train than boys. Case in point- Noodle was fully potty trained by her second birthday while Squish, at two and a half, is still pursuing an ongoing, seemingly unending potty training journey. He is getting better at going to toilet when he needs to but we still have some work to do. I have heard that potty training gets easier in warmer weather, so lets hope that spring brings with it new beginnings.

In the meantime, here are some of my observations of boys compared to girls.  

GIRL:

Uses potty. All bodily fluids flow downwards in a steady stream into the designated receptacle.  

BOY:

Uses potty. Forgets to point urninary transmission apparatus down and sprays liquid on every surface but the toilet.

GIRL:

Has an accident. Shy's away in embarrassment. 

BOY:

Has an accident. Thinks it is hilarious and decides to replay the scene, this time pretending he is a fire truck putting out an imaginary fire.

GIRL:

Wears a panty for the first time. Keeps it on proudly.

BOY:

Wears an underpants for the first time. Quickly discovers the ease of removal and uses it as an opportunity to constantly play streaker. 

GIRL:

Needs to do a number 2. Indicates this need and goes to toilet. Blames the Minion on his underpants for making a poo.

BOY:

Needs to do a number 2. Does it wherever he happens to be. 

What do you think? Are girls easier to potty train than boys? What are your best potty training tricks?

A First Visit to The Planetarium and Fun at Sci Bono

I gave my little ones the choice to pick a place for one last school break day trip and they both enthusiastically chose Sci Bono. We have been here before in November last year (read about our previous visit here) but they liked this visit as much as the last one, if not more. 

There were a couple of new things since our last visit. We got to watch an interactive show on how various parts of the body work. There was also a large new play area for 1 to 9 year old's which my little ones loved. Besides Lego etc to play with, this area has a lot of interactive science displays which are specifically pitched at a younger audience. A lot of the displays for older children are simplified and then there are some different ones too- like feeling different animal hides and identifying different smells blindfolded. (P.S. The Body Worlds Vital Exhibition is also on at Sci Bono at the moment. I went to this about five years ago and it is absolutely fascinating but I was not sure if it is age appropriate for my little ones.)

The other major highlight for my little ones was the Planetarium. Now, I had pictured a large auditorium like the big one at Wits University (which, while admittedly I have not been to in almost twenty years, I have very fond memories of). This one was much more simple and much more compact- in fact it was just a big dome tent with a projector. The R10 ticket price should have given this away but I guess I just thought it was really great value for money. Instead of cinema style seats like the Wits one, it is just an empty tent and you lie down on the foam floors and look up at the stars. The show is also quite short, less than half an hour, but with younger children I think that is ideal as their attention span does not last beyond that anyway.

My little ones enjoyed hearing about the solar system and space travel and I think Squish was almost lulled to sleep while gazing at breathtaking auroras, which the reclined floor position encouraged. Noodle seemed to absorb a lot of what she had heard and had many questions afterwards. This seems to be the start of a new fascination with astronomy. 
 

If you do decide on a trip to Sci-Bono, especially if you want to attend any of the shows, be sure to allocate a whole day to it. We arrived at 9h30 and by 15h45 I had to literally drag my little ones out of there as I knew we would get stuck in horrific CBD traffic if we left any later.

We Tried Out Sweepsouth... And This Is What we Found

Have you heard of Sweepsouth? If not, it is pretty much like Uber for domestic workers (or as they prefer to call them "professional cleaners"). You pay per hour for someone to come clean your house, when it suits you.

The process is quite simple. They have a group of carefully vetted ladies who have gone through criminal checks, test cleans etc and you book them as at your convenience. You log into their website, tick when you need someone to clean, specify how many rooms and it will give you an estimate of how many hours you need to book for. Then you punch in your address and your credit card details and poof, a magical cleaning genie appears at your doorstep at the time you requested. They even work weekends and for an added fee, you can even get them to bring their own cleaning products!

Here is our experience. We have a regular cleaning lady who comes in one day a week (as she only has one day free) but she is near retirement age so were keen to explore other options for when she retires or for when we have a bit of extra work and need someone on a different day of the week on an ad hoc basis. Sweepsouth were kind enough to sponsor us with an eight hour cleaning session- every mom's dream!

Laureen was friendly, needed very little supervision and was very thorough in her cleaning. A once-off proper clean was exactly what my home needed and we definitely got that! The recommended time allocation for cleaning my house and having ironing done was eight hours (they give you an estimate based on the size of your house), so that is what I booked. The allocated eight hours was enough for her to get through all the cleaning but not all the ironing. However, bearing in mind it is school holidays and with two busy little ones causing havoc, my house was a bit of a tsunami, so the fact that a little bit of ironing was left behind  is understandable. The clothing Laureen did manage to iron were ironed properly with no burn marks or shiny marks left behind (my personal pet peeve). 

Laureen had a fascinating story. She is from Zimbabwe and is re-doing her matric in order to improve her marks in the hopes of going on to study physiotherapy. Sweepsouth's flexible hours allows her the flexibility to complete her studies while supporting herself and her eight year old son.

The verdict? Yes, I would use them again. If you need someone on a permanent basis, more than once or twice a week, a regular domestic worker would probably be a better bet as it will probably be cheaper and you can train someone to do things exactly the way you like it. However, if you just need someone occasionally and don't want to be stuck with the drama of dealing with all the labour law issues and other complications that come along with having a regular domestic worker, this is a great option and you can request to have the same person come back if they are available. In my opinion, that's a pretty good deal!